Wow... its been a strange couple of days.
saturday i was suppose to go to the coffee farm but we got rained out...
so i just kinda relaxed and read the word... and did laundry. and such and such
my eye was really bothering me. as always when i go to a foreign country. it was just one eye. now its both. erg. they dont HURT they are just all red.. its weird. i think its the water. or the dust.. or something
anyways. last night karen and jesse and i went to an italian restaurant here in Kigali. it was like a 2 mile walk there.. and then you went through this fence back off the road a ways.. and BAM your in the middle of this jungle thing.. down these steps lit with torces.. and its this adorable little tiki like restaurant.. way up on this hill and its open and you can see the entire city with all the lights.
it was really really really cool. i had pizza.. but i didnt eat too much. didnt want to risk the whole cheese thing... like the milk i had before.
it was funny... because here i am.. a 17 year old.. sitting in an Italian restraunt in AFRICA with a 50 something year old woman and a 31 year old man.. who i like is gay. eating pizza. and idk... talking about politics.. the economy.. and smoking.. and the culture.
haha it was a strange but wonderful thing. ha.
anyways... now the im comfortable here.. ive realized how depressed these people are...
they always talk about their hardships... and they are NEVER comfortable.. always seem to be on the edge. or at least alot of them. and soo many of them just stare at you.. and wont smile.. and its weird becuase in America if someone catches you staring u look away. theese people just stare at you.. turning AROUND to continue to stare. jesse told me to just stare back until they cracked. haha i have yet to try that one.
today we had a meeting with the parents at the school. i had to be there are 7am.. intead of 8. not too bad... but i have to walk like 3 miles... and i couldnt seem to catch a bus this morning!! but i ran into John.. a teacher i work with.. he was strugling to get a bus too.. weird. and we were late together. ha.
everyone is late everywhere here. punctuality doesnt really... exist.
so basically i sat in a meeting outside.. on child size benches... in the middle of this dirt field for at least an hour or two.. with NO idea what was going on because they were all speaking Kinyarwanda!! and everyonce in a while they would say the word Muzungu... and everyone would loook at me and laugh... haha i was soo confused.
app all the parents were telling teddy that they wanted me to come back in January to teach their kids... teddy... and everyone wants me back. oh i wish i could... so bad. but at the same time... not. i mean i have my school to finish.. and as amazing as this is. and as fun... it is so hard.. and exhausting... and yah. ha no. not right now in my life.
but it makes me feel honored :)
its so funny.. teddy doesnt want me to go... and nickie is trying to get me to come to Uganda for longer. when you met someone here its like your their best friend right away!!
im coming home on the 26th tho... im just suppose to.. i know it.
John keeps talking about being my fiance... hahahaha john. its so strange.
u have NO NO NO idea how many guys have asked me to marry them. its like.. ive known u for 3 minutes!!! john at least ive known for a week now. hahaha.
but seriously.. even on the way to this cafe.. this guy and woman called me over at the open little restarant at the end of the road... and oredered me a coke.. and by the end of the conversation the guy was telling me all he wants is to marry a white woman.
its so strange. all they want is white. to be white. to marry white. nickie told me she wants to marry a white man today...
when a guy tells me that.. i wonder if they think it makes me happy. it really doesnt. its like okay... ALL you seem to care about is the color. hmmmmmm what about the heart?
what about WHO i am... not just what i look like.
its a very very strange culture.
i literally could stand in the street and yell WHO WANTS TO MARRY ME... and have my pick.
WHY!? that shouldnt happen. because im white? that is really sad... every man i talk to says they feel better because im around. and that they dont meet many white woman. im just an oppertunity to them... ha. hm. hm. hm.
after school today nickie the little baby and i went up to teddys house for lunch. the view from her house is GORGEOUS. u can see all of kigali! i love it :)
i love it here. and i love the people. but part of me is exhausted. and tired of how i am treated.
they treat me like royalty but.. also kind of like a baby.
becca dont fall
becca eat more
becca sleep
becca eat your meat
becca more sauce.
becca becca becca
i can make my own decisions about how much to eat... but no one listens when i say no more... or that im not tired... it gets kinda.. old.
they love me so much. and i love them to.
its just such a different culture.. everything here is completely upside down from america.
i miss home.. i miss feeling at home. i LOVE it here... and want to be here sooo badly.
but im kinda emotionally spent today.
tired of people staring at me.. and asking me to marry them because im white...
people wanting to be my friend because im white.
part of that makes me happy.. im a symbol of hope in a weird way.. and i have the power to make people smile.
but sometimes i just dont want the attention.
i want people to listen to me when i say i dont want to give them my phone number... or go to dinner with them..
i wish people would listen sometimes. this culture is very pushy.
i love it here. so much. its just sooo strange for me.
did you know that Africans dont grow hair on their arms or legs or feet or stomachs?
they think its soo strange i have hair on my arms.. and that i shave my legs.
i wish i didnt have to shave my legs!! ha.
they love my legs here... its so funny. everyone wants me to wear skirts everyday.
it boosts my confidence thats for sure.
im rambeling. i havent had a chance to collect my thoughts today. ha.
tomorrow i am giving the children their english exams... dont know why. i was told to. ha.
good luck kids!!!
and then i am spending the night at nickies and then very very early wednesday morning im off to uganda!!
i hear people are friendlier there..
i thought the people here are friendly.
but app in comparison they are mean. oh that sounds nice.. i think. ha.
im excited. its like a mini vacation.. in the middle of an amazing trip.
this trip is amazing... with 2 more weeks to go!!!!
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4 comments:
Becca,
This is incredible! Alex posted a bulletin on myspace about your blog and trip, so I thought I would check it out. This seriously incredible! You may not realize it now but you are changing those kids lives. Some may have not had the oppurtunuity to ever meet an American. I kind of know what you mean by the white american thing. When I was in Costa Rica for the Ecology Trip with Mr. Rapin, all of us who were pale and had blonde hair were treated better than those with darker skin and darker hair. It is frusterating sometimes, but it is just a cultural difference. But you are defiantely doing a good thing. You have in a way inspired me to out and do something. I go to WSU and am involved in Campus Crusade for Christ and they have things called Summer Projects. You go to different areas in the US and the world and work with differnet projects. Before I didnt know where I want to go, but now, through reading this I want to go to Africa :)
Hope all is well, stay safe!
-Cailee Olson
Hey you. This one really reminded me of you and what you are getting to go through. We are so blessed in all we have and though all around us we see hurt, suffering, confusion, and brokeness but we are so blessed in what we have and its all because of him. We see it all around us but we are spared because we love him...
Psalm 91
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. [a]
2 I will say [b] of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."
3 Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare
and from the deadly pestilence.
4 He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,
6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.
7 A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.
8 You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.
9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-
10 then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
12 they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
14 "Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life will I satisfy him
and show him my salvation."
Oh Becca, I miss you so much! Your updates are so amazing. I love reading.
So the special thing I promised you…well, because your coming home early I don’t have enough time to send it. But it will be here when you come home. It’s not the same, but it will still put a smile on your face!
There is so much I wish I could talk to you about; I need your guidance and support. I need my Becca, but I know you’ll be home soon, and I’ll just have to live till then.
I love you, everyone loves you.
Roxanne
Becca! Becca! Becca! LOL - your posting made me laugh --- glad you are there and having one heck of a time --- trust me, like with my trip to Europe, this is something you will remember for the rest of your life! So soak it all in ..... I love you!
Uncle Mark
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